Humble Pie, Part Two

I am humbled, moved greatly, that this incomprehensible Creator could love me, and yet He does, powerfully. Not because I am faithful, but because He is faithful. If I got what I deserved, I would be in hell. There's nothing I can present to God that will ever be good enough, that will ever make me good enough. He is Who He is and i am who i am. And nothing can ever make us collide, because there's nothing good I could ever earn to give a holy God in exchange for my soul. 
But then there's Jesus. 
This perfect sacrifice, who had to be fully God yet fully Man, because only Someone that had the blood of a human body pulsing through His veins, yet living a completely blameless life could be offered up for our ugliness. Only beauty can replace ugly, and only love can replace evil. And if that wasn't enough, and it was more than enough, God loves us, in our present earthly form, wildly.
I've been awful, I mean really awful. Struggling, honestly. Can I be that real? Well, there you have it. But God, oh so good, has heavily blessed me. I mean, Sunday afternoon I stood under a mulberry tree having fellowship with a believer and eating off of God's land, and just feeling this heavenliness about it all. Am I allowed that sort of peace in the middle of my ugly? And this week He has showered me with trinkets of His love through people that love Him, and all I can do is bow face low, and profusely give Him glory for all He deserves. Why is it that God of all is pursuing me? Shouldn't I be tripping, limb over limb, arms outstretched, just trying to catch a glimpse of glory before my mortality runs out? And yet He, in this unexplainable kindness, gives me Sunday afternoon tastes of life everlasting, Monday morning blessings, and sends me surprise chicken pot pie because He loves me, and God moves on His people to love one another well. I want to be a tool for Christ, I want my hands to be washed by His blood, raised up in thankfulness, and outstretched in an imitation of His love and kindness. 
We are selfish, prideful, condemned if left to our own devices. It's God's kindness that leads us to repentance, "While we were still sinners, Christ died for us" (Romans 5:8). So that becomes enough. And all else is extra. What love is this, that we would be pursued while we hated all that was good and holy? It's the only belief system that covers all with grace. All I've seen lately is grace. Why is tragedy the general predecessor to prostration before the Lord? Shouldn't we look at the glory all around, and thank Him before we have to call on Him in the midst of calamity? We need Him in the good and the tragedy. We thank Him for them equally, because one upholds the other. And me, wanting so desperately to allow my flesh to outweigh the goodness all around have been held back by a Holy Hand, keeping me thankful. And this God is even giving me the breath to thank Him with. 


Breaks and Blessings

If you've been reading for awhile, you might remember a post last year regarding the blessing of partnering with Lifesong for Orphans for our adoption fundraising. Well, in celebration(?) of Tax Day, I thought I would re-post their how-to's on how to give -- an added benefit is all donations are tax deductible! Also, they've sent a PayPal button located on the right of the page to make one click giving an option as well :) We are so thankful to everyone who has walked with us in so many ways on this journey, and we seriously covet the prayers of the saints for wisdom and guidance on our way to another Little Abear.

For friends & family interested in donating online, you can head over to www.lifesongfororphans.org/give/donate.
Select “Give to an Adoptive Family" and enter in our account number {#4510} and family name fields {Hebert}. PayPal charges of 2.9% & 0.30 per transaction will be deducted from each donation. Checks on our behalf can be mailed to 
Lifesong for Orphans, PO Box 40, Gridley, IL 61744. 
Please include our family name and account number in the memo. 100% of each donation received will be placed towards our adoption. Donations under $250 will be mailed a tax receipt upon request.




Late last night I heard the familiar chime of emails coming through my phone. I checked, not really expecting anything in particular, but found two emails stating what CARA wants us to send over relating to the adoption. And then it got real. Awhile back while walking through the store I had a similar moment, that this working towards bringing a new life into our lives was becoming a reality - and last night it happened in the sort of way that as I was sitting there staring at our adoption handbook I got lost in the moment, thinking about it all. Little Abear, meeting his sibling for the first time, the plane ride(s), it was like I got a little jolt. Can I be this close to breathing normally again? Holding it all in for nearly three years, my chest tight, knowing all the waiting will be eternally worth it, am I really close enough to the knowledge of who my little one is? And what will that knowledge produce? I can't imagine waiting longer, knowing who they are but not being able to hold them, tell them how loved they have always been, play with them, introduce them to a world unlike their own, for better or for worse... but wait we will. Each breath one closer to another love, my chest just a little tighter with the nearness of it all.


Write On

We were blessed to celebrate a friend's birthday with her last weekend, a gal who is quite the talented artist. I decided to go ahead and celebrate by using pen & watercolors to create a handful of postcards for her, hopefully she enjoys these as much as I enjoyed crafting them!